Caddy Dictionary, Golf Terms, Looper Lingo - L

L-BOMB - (n) a loser.
Someone who sucks to be around for whatever reason.

EX: L-bombs generally brag about things they don't do themselves nor earn first hand (e.g. bragging about championship teams, businesses inherited, money not earned, etc.)

LAKE – (v) the tossing of young caddies into the course's water hazards, creeks, and ponds.
A simple time honored ritual of caddy shack hazing.  Tends to occur in the evenings when young smart-ass loopers mouth off to their looping elders.  If after being launched into a lake, the young looper still runs their mouth, they then get rolled in a sand trap.

EX: I got laked by Beegle and Brownie while plunging the range.

LAZER – (n) a low, hot, high velocity golf shot sometimes referred to as a worm burner. 

Whether produced by plan/skill or inadequate ball striking one thing remains true - they are caddie killers, beware. 

You may also find them useful when hitting balls at the driving range, especially if the moron driving the range cart is one of your caddie cohorts.

EX: Golf balls have been clocked lazering over 200 mph.

LIFER – (n) a looper for life.

Golf Ball Eddie has been looping at Bel Air CC since the age of 13.  He is now 78 and still eats three to five loops weekly.

Example of an Old Jenson Looper or a Lifer 

EX: A smart lifer simply stays single and never reports a dime.

LINE OF PUTT – (n) the arcane and arbitrary path a golf ball is intended to travel over the putting green toward the hole. 

They are imaginary trip wires players use to torment one another with.  If your foot is even on the green you could allegedly be in someone's imaginary line somewhere.

EX: Loopers many times have to hurdle lines of putt in order to reach the flagstick fast enough.

LOOP – (n) a caddy's round of golf service.

       (v) to slug or chase someone’s clubs around a golf course while doing the backbreaking work no player cares for.

To caddie is to literally loop one's life around a golf course. 

Loop your life around this ↑

EX: It is the persistent grinder caddy who always seems to catch a loop.

LOOPER - (n) a golf servant who chases or schleps clubs around a golf course while doing the backbreaking work no player cares for.

The coolest name for a caddie.

EX: Some claim loopers a dying breed, we beg to differ.

LOOPHOLE - (n) the cracks and spaces caddies disappear into avoiding painful loops.

When there aren’t that many horses in the barn and Mr. & Mrs. Haverkampf have shoed up looking for a bag totter, you'd better have a hole to crawl inside.

EX: As a youth my favorite loophole was a tiny space behind the vending machines.

LOOSE IMPEDIMENT – (n) any natural object not fixed or growing can be removed so long as the golf balls lie is not affected (hazards are the exception to the rule).

This includes: leaves, glass, cigarette butts, old newspaper stacks, broken twigs, used condoms, crack rocks, or stained tube socks.

EX: I’m pretty sure trees are not considered loose impediments.

LOST BALL – (n) a ball not found within 5 minutes of searching.

This will mean the caddie has officially lost their ass and the player has to do a walk/jog of shame back to where he last hit - unless of course they cheat.

EX: In golf, lost balls suck and penalty strokes are insult to injury.

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